Saturday 24 March 2001

Perils of a Long Distance Relationship

I don't think I'd ever recommend an LDR as such. They chafe the emotions; one is in a constant state of longing, blissful half-dreams only to wake up to an empty bed, aching for a cuddle or a long silly chat or just to have them there; and they aren't there.

I imagine it is far worse when you do not feel grounded in the relationship; when you have niggling doubts, worries and concerns you can't voice; when every little issue threatens to blow up into a full-scale conflict; when there is emotional baggage and blackmail.

Fortunately I can strike off all of the above, and I can't believe my luck in actually feeling safe and cared for. And I sure as hell don't take it for granted. We manage pretty well; there's lots of emailing, ICQing, telephoning, care packages being sent across the sea blah di blah. So we're doing everything right. And its only 5 weeks 6 days to go. Considering we commenced looking down the barrel of several months this is not long at all.

But oh jaaaayyyyysis. My phone bills ... Here's an example. 

My beloved called this morning, it wasn't a terribly opportune moment, so I called him back. We chatted about all things and nothing, and giggled and sighed at each other. As one does, you understand. After a bit I thought to myself "hmmm this has been a long phone call, must be around one and a half hours, holy shit, maybe two hours".

Checked my watch. 

Four hours. FOUR FUCKING HOURS we had been on the phone. Okay I know I'm chatty but I have never spoken that long on a phone call (usually my bladder is bursting, f'r instance). And I have certainly never known a Mere Male to be happy to chat that long, to be no other place than there, on the phone, with me. Wow. And oh okay, *swoon*. But oh lordy I am not looking forward to that next Telstra envelope dropping through my mailbox. Yeesh.

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Listening to:

Ella Fitzgerald

Reading:

"The Language of the Genes" - Steve Jones

"Pythagoras' Trousers; God, Physics and the Gender Wars" - Margaret Wertheim

"Grass" - Sherri Tepper

Health Update:

Day 14 of no painkillers whatsoever

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