Tomás Ford_/,?,

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WHAT IS HAPPENING TO MY SKIN?
Tomás Ford's DISTRACTOMATIC _//May 2008

INDEX // WHAT YOU’RE DOING FRIDAY (IF YOU LIVE IN PERTH }…_/  SOMEBODY SHUT ME UP /_ THINGS THAT SUCK   / THINGS TO DO IN A SEPARATE WINDOW WHILE YOU SURF PORN SITES /] AGING RECORDS YOU SHOULD TOTALLY SCORE OFF BITTORRENT ../ WHY PERTH IS NOT AS LAME AS YOU KEEP TELLING ME IT IS / OUT OF CONTEXT REVIEW QUOTE OF THE MONTH // UPCOMING TOMAS FORD GIGS////////////////////////////////////////////////!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!///1!?!

WHAT YOU’RE DOING FRIDAY [IF YOU LIVE IN PERTH )

 I hardly ever play at Mojo’s, despite it being in my Top 5 Venues Ever and it being one songs’ worth of driving from my house. I don’t know why; my shows always go really well there. If you haven’t been before or you’re not from around these here parts, it’s the pub with all the coloured BBQ lights out front on Queen Victoria Street in North Fremantle . It’s intimate without being uncomfortable, the sound’s always good and the audiences are always a lot of fun and if I drink too much I can walk home.  

Anyway, this show’s going to be great; the lineup features quite a few bands doing really weird, freaky shit, but in different and interesting ways. We have Gutter Guitar opening, who is Bassta! Pex from ear-fucking bass noise act Abe Sada doing some really cool solo stuff and Cease are mega-intense and the small confines of Mojo’s will probably make their set feel like a descent into hell. In a good way.

I’m playing at the stroke of midnight but you’re going to want to get down early to burst some capillaries in your eardrum. This lineup isn’t for the musically faint-hearted, but if you’re on my email list, you’ll be fine. And if it sucks we can just sit out the back and play pool and I’ll let you buy me sambuca and cokes. But it won’t suck. So come.

SOMEBODY SHUT ME UP
Aloha,

I still haven’t uploaded the website, even though I’ve been talking about it for about four months now. Well don’t keep yourself awake at night any more; it’s really close. Just a couple of design problems to overcome and a whole pile of distractions to avoid and it’ll be up. I’ve been writing so many songs this month; I’m always a really prolific writer when there are other things I should be doing. It’s good though. I’m starting to feel like I’m just about ready to shoot my load (of songs) all over (a new album).

I’m sorry. Those brackets were totally immature.

The tour’s coming together really well; I’ll let you know all about it in the next issue. I’m totally psyched about pretty much every show I’m playing, which is a delightful situation. Now I just have to promote them. Which is a much less delightful situation. It’s unrelentingly boring. Totally worth it in the end, but still, the thought of it makes me want to sleep or play sodoku or go hiking or do anything but beg for press coverage. Yay! I love D.I.Y.!!! I guess this would be a good time to mention that if you’re in NSW, VIC, TAS or the ACT and feel like putting up some posters or have some kind of super-secret, super-awesome connection at some super-awesome publication/radio station/website and feel like sharing it with me, let me know. No pressure or anything. I can’t offer any payment but I can put you in my Myspace Top 8, which I think is a much more valuable kind of social currency. ;)

There’s been a lot of behind the scenes action lately, so I’m really looking forward to the Perth shows I’ve got coming up. I mean, a boy’s gotta get his party on every so often (Excuse the scarf and shirt; I was trashed and giggly and it was very cold and I didn’t think it’d end up on the internet). I plan to mix my setlist up quite a lot for the next few shows.  So if you’re coming out and have any requests for songs you’d like to hear, let me know and I’ll see if I can rock them out for you.

Aloha,

Tomás

THINGS THAT SUCK 

THINGS TO DO IN A SEPARATE WINDOW WHILE YOU SURF PORN SITES
Get Even More NIN MP3’s
http://theslip.nin.com
I’ve only just started digesting the sprawling ambient release Nine Inch Nails put out a couple of months back. Hell, I’m not even finished basking in the digital hardcore concept album goodness of last year’s Year Zero, and you’re telling me there’s another full album to keep up with? You can’t accuse him of profiteering; this one’s free and the last one was five bucks. 

Get Dan Deacon MP3’s
http://www.dandeacon.com/mp3/
If you like me and you like the sound of the theme music to Nintendo games, you’ll like Dan Deacon. He’s put all his previous records online for free. Acorn Master is my favourite, but A Green Acorn Is Awesome vs The Sun is a pretty intensely cool bit of hour-long drone.

…Which Would Be A Totally Bodacious Soundtrack For…
http://www.sydlexia.com/top100nes.htm
Perusing the list of the Top 100 Nintendo Entertainment System games of all time on sydlexia.com.  My personal favourite NES game ever was U*Four* Ia. I must’ve played that a million times before giving up halfway through the final boss level.

AGING RECORDS YOU SHOULD TOTALLY SCORE OFF OF BITTORRENT
This month’s selections are all LP’s I bought for a dollar each from a second hand record store in Pinjarra last weekend. In order of awesomeness…

Let’s Stick Together – Bryan Ferry
Obviously Roxy Music are awesome, yeah? Well, our friend Bryan’s third solo album retreads some of the best moments from their debut record in a croonier, jazzier mode. This are definitely the better versions of 2HB, Sea Breezes and Casanova, in a style you’d probably get a bit sexy to. My parents have a soft spot for this record and I suspect I was conceived to the sound of the title track.

Dinner Music For People Who Aren’t Very Hungry – Spike Jones
A kitchy, swingin’ comedy record based around an extended monologue about testing the limits of your hi-fi system. It flits between being dated (vintage-style) and hilarious. I can’t tell you about it, it’s funny in ways that don’t make sense when I write them down. But you should listen to it.

Country Moog – Switched On Nashville
You’re better off scouring the many moog-related blogs for this one; it features moog arrangements of Folsom Prison Blues and Yakety Yak. The Johnny Cash cover has a robot voice in it and repetitive bassline that makes me think of it as almost a companion piece to Kraftwerk’s Radioactivity. Awesome.

WHY PERTH IS NOT AS LAME AS YOU KEEP TELLING ME IT IS

OUT OF CONTEXT REVIEW QUOTE OF THE MONTH

"The audience participation on this night took on a whole new level to previous viewings, with Mr Ford no doubt winning respect in the end as he continuously flew in the face of a crowd that did everything from laugh at him, dance with him, grab the mic from his hands and even forcing Tomás to endure punches and two handed pushes as he walked through the crowd of Tomás Ford virgins."

- Grafton Primary support at Capitol; Drum Media Perth, 17/4/08  

UPCOMING TOMAS FORD

FRIDAY MAY 16
STRANGE MUSIC BY STRANGE PEOPLE
MOJO’S BAR, NORTH FREMANTLE WA
With Cease + Whalehammer + Alpha Koi + Gutter Guitar
Friday’s show is going to be huge; the other acts on this lineup make a variety of scary noiserock sounds that’ll blow your head clean off. If you haven’t seen me play at Mojo’s, you haven’t lived. The venue is practically designed with me in mind and the sound is always fantastic.

FRIDAY MAY 23
CHINA HORSE TWO
SECRET VENUE, PERTH WA
With Electric Limosine + Voltaire Twins + Shock! Horror! + Petrosex + Rex Monsoon + Bend And Snap + Hickey
If you prefer to think of yourself as a Dance Dance Revolutionary, perhaps China Horse Two will be more up your alley. It’s secret, but if you befriend them on myspace they might tell you where it is when the venue announcement email goes out… www.myspace.com/chinahorse

THURSDAY JUNE 12
COTTONMOUTH V
BAR 459, ROSEMOUNT HOTEL , MT LAWLEY WA
The May edition SOLD OUT. We actually had to turn people away. From a spoken word gig. The awesomeness of Cottonmouth is totally out of control. I thought the shows would get less party-tastic as they went along, but as people are starting to realise good spoken word + music + alcohol = party, it’s just getting more and more off the hook. It’s a fully programmed lineup with a musical guest each month, and we leave our open mic section ‘til the end (so if you want to avoid it you totally can), so these nights are tightly programmed bursts of awesomeness. You should check it out so you can pretend you liked it before it was cool.  

JULY 17-26
EAST COAST TOUR 
Canberra … Sydney … Melbourne … Bendigo ... Hobart …. I’m getting so excited I’m finding it hard to breathe. I’ve never been to Hobart before, so I’m really looking forward to the fourteen hours I’ll get to spend there, mostly hanging around doing a soundcheck. But dinner will be nice.

MEANWHILE
Check out http://www.tomasford.com (it sucks but there's still a lot of cool content on there and I'm about to change the entire thing so you may as well read it while you can) and http://www.myspace.com/tomasford (.)

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1: I thought it was common knowledge, or I wouldn’t have said. Sorry if that was a shock.

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